Is it OK to cry at work?

 

Pictures of a weepy Rachel Reeves dominated the newspaper front pages and TV news after her tearful appearance at Prime Minister's Questions earlier this week.

 Her emotional appearance caused so much fear in the markets that the cost of government borrowing immediately increased and the pound fell. The sight of most of us crying in the workplace is unlikely to move financial markets, but does it matter if you do?

 Does it show weakness, or strength, or simply that you're in touch with your emotions?

 Anecdotally, having a slight sniffle at work is not uncommon. Several people got in touch with the BBC to say they had let it all out.

 Clara, 48, from Lancaster, said she had become emotional when she was a young graduate getting a "blasting", and years later "in frustration".

 "I've also cried after receiving bad news from home and left work immediately."

 Emma, meanwhile, felt she had to keep her emotions under wraps because she worked in "a tough male-dominated environment" and would give herself a hard time for "showing emotion or 'weakness'."

 Although some research has suggested women are more likely than men to cry, plenty of men told us they had also shed tears in front of colleagues.

 "With patients, colleagues, and families over the years, when I've shared their sadness," said Guy Clayton, a doctor. A 38-year-old from London who works in finance said he had become emotional at work when dealing with personal issues and felt it showed "a professional dedication" to still turn up.

 'Strength, not a liability'

 So, is crying a good or bad thing? Executive coach and success mentor Shereen Hoban says it's old-fashioned to think weeping at work is unacceptable.

 According to her, "We've moved beyond the old-fashioned idea that professionalism means leaving emotion at the door." "Emotional intelligence is a strength in today's world, not a weakness." Career coach Georgia Blackburn says it's not unusual for people at work to be upset, so firms need to know how to handle and support staff who are feeling a bit fragile.

 She claims that in the end, it will result in workers accomplishing more. She asserts, "In the long run, an employer that truly listens, shows compassion, and understanding is so much more likely to keep their staff motivated and happier."

Amanda cried during an interview - and still got the job

 Amanda in Stockport, who made contact with the Jeremy Vine show on BBC Radio 2, experienced this. She cried at a job interview at the University of Manchester 17 years ago, just after her father had been diagnosed with cancer.

 She was hired and is still employed there. "I cried every day for about nine months until my dad sadly passed away.  It just made me realize how wonderful my employer is and how wonderful my workplace is, where that was acceptable." "Return crying."

Amy Powney believes that it has become taboo to express one's feelings at work. Fashion designer Amy Powney was having a bit of a rough time at the end of last year.

 She was having an "intense" time leaving a job, and it coincided with traumatic things happening in her life.

 Amy, who founded sustainable fashion brand Akyn earlier this year, also felt pressure to be a "poster child" for ethical fashion.

 She stated on BBC Radio 4's Woman's Hour, "My to-do list at that time was: feed the kids, pick them up from school, sort that nursery thing, design the next collection, make sure the staff are okay, sort that VAT return... and then save the world." "I went through this period of time where I just could not stop crying and I was doing it in public places, I was doing it on stage."

 She thinks that showing emotion at work has been "demonised" and is unapologetic about breaking down.

 "I just think bring back the crying, bring back the emotions," she says.

 "Women in leadership should be able to show their emotion.  I think it's a superpower.  I consider it a strength." Staff vs. bosses, men vs. women But not everybody thinks that way.  Some people are still a teensy bit judgemental, says Ann Francke, chief executive at the Chartered Management Institute (CMI).

 She asserts that men who mope can be slammed for being soft and vulnerable, whereas women who weep are regarded as "too emotional." Junior staff can get away with it more than their bosses, but this shouldn't necessarily be the case, she adds.

 "When a senior leader cries, it can be seen as shocking or even inappropriate.  But when handled with authenticity, it can also be powerful.  She asserts, "It demonstrates that leaders are human and care deeply about what they do." But if you want to climb the greasy pole, it could be best to keep a stiff upper lip, at least in some organisations, says executive coach Shereen Hoban.

 She warns that crying could hurt your chances of getting promoted. "Let's be honest.  There's still a bias in some workplaces that sees composure as strength and emotion as instability."

 But she says some organisations see things differently, and value leaders who are "real, self-aware, and able to navigate complexity, including their own emotions".

 She adds that if you break down once at work it "won't ruin your career", and that what matters more is the bigger picture:

 "Your performance, your presence, and how you bounce back or move forward with intention," she says.

 What to do if you become tearful at work

 Allow yourself to slow down and take a moment to reflect. You don't need to hide your emotions, it often shows you care deeply about your job – that's not a bad thing

 But you should feel supported, so maybe talk to a trusted colleague, take a short break or ask for support from your manager or HR

 Managers and colleagues need to acknowledge when their staff are crying – offer a tissue to them, don't pretend it's not happening